Individual psychology claims that every individual has their own life style that people have doesn’t change. Individual contributes his/her own life based on his/her own life style.
Friendship, comradeship, and social connection towards others are important components for having our own life style.
In order to have good friendship and comradeship, we should be honest, responsible, and interested in others’ welfare. In order to have good social connection and to be accepted by society, we should be useful, working and creating. Every individual has their own meaning of life. It’s linked by what an individual wants and what a society want from an individual.
There is a feeling of inferiority that every individual feels when an individual cannot give what society needs from him/her. For example; children with body defective organs are trying to compensate these lacks by finding something to do to make them have feeling of superiority. They can be a coachman and then they have a life style based on this goal of good-likeness, and they behave, move, understand, feel, and express themselves dependent upon this life style.
We can give another example about hated children who are illegitimate or unwanted.
They feel inferiority because society doesn’t accept them and threat them as they are an enemy. So their goal of superiority is being a powerful person by suppressing others.
Lack of social feelings can be treated by teachers for children, and can be treated by psychotherapists for adults. If they cannot have true social feelings, they cannot join with others when they face a new situation like school, marriage, and friendship. These people can be problematic children, criminals, neurotics, and they can commit suicide. Alfred gave an example of a boy. He found his home atmosphere in his class thanks to his teacher, so that he wasn’t a problematic child. When the teacher went, and a new one came, he felt that he came into a new environment and he was incapable of getting used to this new situation. He wanted to center of attention and to be appreciated, but he couldn’t do this because of lack of social courage. So that he became superior on truancy, and he took enough attention by others even if this superiority is wrong and mistake.
Adler says that all of them show us every individual have inferiority feelings about something. And their way of reaching superiority to compensate their inferiority feeling is the way of their life style.
Problematic children and adults, neurosis, crimes are the individual who has a wrong and mistake life style and which built up in early childhood.
The style of life is starting form first three and four years. After first three and four years, it reaches almost its fix position. So, for neurosis, crimes and problem children and adults, parents have biggest part of responsibility. If they teach them courage for social feelings for new environment, children will not have wrong and mistake superiority feelings. Parents can make their children face with different environment as much as possible. Parents should teach their children that personal and common happiness are dependent upon the interest of each other. If parents fail to teach these, the mistakes should be seen early by specialist teachers, and then psychotherapists, psychologists, social workers; and they have to work on how to correct these mistakes so that to increase social feelings and responsibilities.
Makaleyi özetleyen:Şeyda Varol
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